Trying to find my authentic self., this hurts
Story
Hello, thank you for taking the time to listen to my story. First, I’d like to express my sincerity to myself that being truthful to yourself is very important. We let our egos, and we let our Negative situation’s or are shortcomings overwhelm us. Alot of the times it defines us, and it ends with negativity.
i’m at a crossroads in my life at 32 years old and I’m not somebody that has ever asked for help. I have worked hard for everything that I’ve acquired.  Mental health is so tricky and falling victim to depression or not being able to humble your own ego is where I start need work. I am currently homeless at the moment living in my car that doesn’t have current registration and won’t pass smog which I don’t blame the car. It is 23 years old but to try to replace the issue doesn’t make sense financially, when even a used car doesn’t cost that much money for what it needs. I have a full-time job with a low-voltage company which I am a third-year apprentice and currently go to school So I can acquire my blue card certificate in the trade of fire life safety. I love my job I love going to work, and I like learning every day. I have great coworkers, and the owners and people in management are also good people which I like to express my Appreciation to them. I had a place with the mother of my child, but when she left to move in with her mother and brother, I was unable to fulfill the bills in whole alone ., even with the amount of hours I work As hurtful as that situation was and still is with barely being able to see my daughter., people grow apart and I have grown to accept her wishes. I write this right now and I am not only crying to where I can barely see what I’m writing, but I am tired. I am questioning my faith. I am constantly fighting myself.,  being negative. I’ve always had a big heart, and I’ve always wanted to do my part in society, and always wanted to put a smile on peoples faces. I’m a happy guy and want to be a helping hand when I can. Being of service!! Is what I call it. Since a kid, I wanted to please people so much that I followed the crowd I was easily influenced in my later teenage years. I was an alcoholic., marijuana abuser, and I took prescription pills.. when you suppress your feelings like me, you never know when those feelings will pop up., my PTSD from my parents and childhood trauma, have great effects on my happiness. They say you have to detach yourself from your parents and be your own person and I try to do that, but it doesn’t stop from what I went through in the last 5 years., not only did I lose my father from a drug overdose, but a childhood friend from suicide a few months after.  Since then, I decided I would be sober completely from any mind altering Substances and I have stayed committed for three years now. I trained, and I completed a half Iron Man triathlon race. I have tried to make myself a better person, through sobriety and being healthy. And I felt I have put in a lot of work to better myself, but it doesn’t stop my financial or my shortcomings from occurring. I ask myself is this God‘s plan for me to struggle day in and day out .  I know money does not solve your problems but it makes your problems more manageable I’m living paycheck to paycheck with Most of my money going to gas my storage unit and my insurance. Oh yeah and my phone bill. I have little to no family at all and I’ve never had money or came from money so I don’t know anything about financial freedom. I know how to be conservative,  budget and Penny pinch. I’m hoping that someone that reads this can feel my sincerity and know that i’m not looking for a hand out. I’m looking to regain my authentic self. I’m looking to get myself out of this negative never ending climb to the surface. I just need A little start me up.. I don’t know how much I’m asking for But if I thought about it, It would  be nice to have a new, reliable car. It would  be nice to have first and last months rent for an apartment. Not saying that is going to make my life all better again, but I know in my heart if I had some type of help and I was able to pick up my daughter safe and I was able to build who I am up ., I would be able to get back and give back to others , I am a leader, when I’m not in this predicament, and I would ultimately love to mentor, and simply not feeling depressed and antisocial Because of shame because of my current situation more status So what I’m asking for is some financial help!!  in return I become a better person a positive person and eventually give it back with helping others maybe not financially but through spirituality through good energy. And being my authentic self to wear, I can help gravitate it winning circle. It said write a short description, so I don’t wanna say too much more, but if you can help me get out of this way of life and these uncertain times you would be doing a lot more than you know because I plan to pay it back and I plan to be somebody That give others hope And gives a shoulder to cry on, and a ear to listen to. Thank you for reading and I hope this reaches you well.
Cheyne Garcia 5624825009
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dmark44001 –
Your story has deeply moved us, and I’m pastor David Mark, a dedicated helper of those in need. As part of our church’s outreach program, we visit cyber begging sites to provide financial support to individuals who require assistance. We allocate 20% of our church’s income every month to this cause. If you’re in need of help, please don’t hesitate to contact me with your full name, current home address, cellphone number, and the amount needed via email. [email protected] or +1 786-632-6715